Shave And A Hair Cut
The time is coming nigh.
Another life decisions.
Once again, it could cause trauma and drama and have repercussions that will echo through the ages.
Or at least about six weeks.
It’s hair. My hair.
As I’ve stated over the years, the texture of my hair leads me to imagine writing the “real” story of my family tree.
“Yes, that’s William, he fought in the Civil War and this is Gertie, she liked to have sex with farm animals.”
I believe my hair has the approximate texture of the offspring of a goat, a yak, and my great aunt Gertie. (When discussing sex with farm animals, it is always to distance yourself by at least one generation.)
My weird hair will not curl. My weird hair is approximately as thick as three people’s hair. My weird hair has always been very sad. Oh, and there’s also the thing about me hating to mess with my hair and if “styling” my hair takes more than three minutes, I will not do it. (“Styling” in my world is synonymous with “combing”).
But I’ve decided to take the bull by the horns (or should I say goat?) and use modern technology to find a new hairstyle. Of course, I’m looking for your input here…
First of all, I need a picture of myself.
Now, before I can go forward, I need to see where I’m starting from…
I offer this as what my most recent hair style has been. It is great for supporting the hair products industry and picking up girls at the bar, however, I have made a moral decision that I will not support the hair products industry. You know, because God told me it was wrong…
Perhaps I should just go 80’s retro? Mullets are always stylin’, right? right?
Maybe I could even start a band!
This is what my hair always wants to be. It’s kind of like those dead bears that they flatten and make into a rug.
I’m thinking I need some hair so that I can sing with the B 52’s because that is my overall life goal.
Or perhaps be the beautiful kick ass leader of the resistance?
Or perhaps the real cost cutting style, the Yule Brenner?
While I’m not a fan of keeping up with coloring my hair, if I were to color it, it would have to be blue.
With pink polka dots.
As you can see, I’m in need of a little bit of guidance.